I have returned again to xseño, the world which I have made. Paula had taken me to a secret place beneath the trees, a shimmering enclosure of white rocks. She studied me hard until finally she said, “You don’t remember creating this world. You don’t remember our birth.” I was not sure if it was a question or a statement, but I answered no anyways. Paula did not speak for a long time, I followed her to el rio and she caught las pescas with her hands, only waning them into the water and asking for their life to be passed to us. “We work together, you see.” She told me. “You decided that everything would be done as one, everyone would look after each other, we would never again be on our own.” She said these words were echoed to her by her grandmother, and then her mother, and she was to recite them to her own children. “They were what you wanted for us,” she said. 
        I was still not sure where it all came from. How could I have invented this world before I consumed this pill? How had this world formed a century before I exsisted?? I have no idea. At least, I found some desolate clarity soon enough. Paula said, when the boy drowned in the river, the people were looking for who to blame, because when something goes wrong… Someone is not working for the community, that’s when things go wrong. Paula told me my own words softly, but patiently. I couldn't resist. At one point I brushed the hair out of her face. She stepped back at this and so I asked her, “And how has that worked so far?” 
       “We do not hope for anything more,” she said, “We are all equals here, we hope for nothing more than this.” This does not sound like me.